Monday 20 January 2014

From Script to Screen: Story behind Sculptor [Revisited 2]



The Sculptor [Revisited 2]




  • Sculptor who does wax works for fairgrounds is hired to sculpt horses for a merry-go-round
  • On his lunch break he takes out an apple, sandwich and a boiled egg
  • After finishing his sandwich and apple he prepares to eat his boiled egg
  • A seagull takes the egg just before he is about to eat it and flies up to its nest in the top of fairground Ferris wheel
  • The angry sculptor climbs Ferris wheel to get his egg
  • The sculptor and seagull struggle for egg
  • Egg falls and both seagull and sculptor stare in horror
  • But egg lands unharmed on road outside the grounds and both sculptor and seagull are relieved
  • Then a car comes and runs over the egg

2 comments:

  1. Okay - a quick test to see if you're actually using your story components; ask yourself this question: what does it matter that your character is a sculptor? How does him being a sculptor effect or change or shape your story - answer? It doesn't! Again, why does it matter that your story takes place in a fairground? It doesn't. The action in your story could just as easily be taking place in any built up environment. You need to ask yourself a few more challenging questions: what is the relationship between the character and the location and the object; at the moment, your story would work the same if it was like this: a fisherman is mending his nets by a tall ship. He stops to eat a mushroom. A bird takes the mushroom to the top of a mast. The fisherman climbs up. The mushroom falls down. The mushroom gets crushed by a passing Rhino... do you see how ALL of your story components are completely passive and not giving you anything? Time to work them all a bit harder, Ashley - onwards!

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  2. building on what Phil says, I think the key is to try and find a special connection between the components - for example, the egg is connected to the sculptor because it's actually a sculpture of an egg that he made; the sculptor is connected to the fairground because his parents were clowns and he ran away from the circus to be an artist; the egg is connected to the fairground because it's a prize in a fairground stall...

    It's not essential that all 3 things directly tie together, but the 2 "disconnected" words should be tied together by the 3rd.

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